While leaving a Christmas party...

A group of guys watching me back out of the driveway onto a street of parked cars:

"She's gonna hit it...she's gonna hit it....aaaaaaaand smash!"

Not Waving but Drowning

Nobody heard him, the dead man,
But still he lay moaning:
I was much farther out than you thought
And not waving but drowning.

Poor chap, he always loved larking
And now he's dead
It must have been too cold for him his heart gave way,
They said.

Oh, no no no, it was too cold always
(Still the dead one lay moaning)
I was much too far out all my life
And not waving but drowning.

Stevie Smith

______________________________________________________

Stevie Smith was a woman. Of course she understands. Only women see the drowning.

Understandably, I am beginning to sound like a radical feminist of sorts; that, or a male-hating lesbian. But really, I am neither. I am scared of men. And if I continue, this will become too personal for a blog.

Being a woman is a high calling. And no, this is not an outraged Femi-Nazi speech. But as I am graced with age each year, I have come to realize that there exists a much higher standard for which human beings are called. And the more I know about the kind of woman I wish to become, the more I fall short of becoming it. A woman holds great responsibility.

Life is about much more than oneself. And some live their entire lives without realizing this. Grow up and get over yourselves. The problems of the world cannot wait for you to quit your perverted self-indulgence.

See, every woman has the potential to be one of excellence. And I will be the first to admit that it is difficult. But sadly, more often than not, women do not behave respectably. Not to mention intelligently. They prance around with their giggles and mini-skirts in hopes of being noticed by the wandering eyes of undisciplined men. They chat and gossip incessantly, speaking about all the wrong things at all the wrong times. They leech their way through life with a cute dumbness that only, I am sorry to say, dumb men eat up. Why is a woman satisfied when her apparel garners lustful stares from a man! She smugly thinks that in doing so, she has conquered men (and the women these men are with) -- when in fact, she has only foolishly defeated herself. What a halfwit. In such a scenario, man and woman have both fallen short of their responsibility, and have both been defeated. We can do away with men that are aroused by such stupid, primal instincts. It is so very unattractive. We should expect to have men that are aroused by beautiful minds.

This is why I do not believe in the phrase, "Boys will be boys". It is a cushy excuse for poor behaviour, and men will never rise to the challenge of excellence. I do not see anything stopping an independent woman from disposing of a man who complacently lives by such a phrase. Being a man is a high calling as well.

I am driven by a few select women in my life, whose words and actions are of the utmost integrity. These are women of passion and quiet intensity, strength and delicacy. They speak well for their beliefs, and their good reputations preceed them. They have impeccable taste, and sophistication in character. And they settle for nothing but excellence.